EM FIELDS

HEY GUYS. First things first- hope you are well, loving yourself, saying nice things about yourself and looking after yourself (if not turn yourself in! em@theemfields.com).

Inspired by this nasty article that was written about the gorgeous Tash Oakley, today I wanted to talk about something that's reeeally been grinding my gears lately; the 'instagram VS. real life' bullshit.

First of all- is this supposed to make me feel better you straight up bully? 'Be a negative asshole about people you don't even know and you can have a fulfilling and happy life too!' *rolls eyes*

Before I get into my standard 'love yo'self' pep talk, I'm going to make crystal clear the not-so-ugly truths about the world of social media so that all you negative nancy's can shhhhhh.

Social Media, aside from communication and now the business aspect, is created almost exclusively for shameless self promotion. THERE I SAID IT, NOW GET OVER IT. It is designed to post selfies, talk about ourselves, show the world what we're doing, reach out to people, communicate, and where we see fit, do good. It seems that with this, the world has created a 'damned if you do, damned if you don't' mentality. I could sit here all day and celebrate all of the wonderful things about myself, or I could sit here, and drown in sorrow over all the things I hate. Either way, I get called arrogant, or negative and annoying. I've said it before and I will say it again- if you have nothing better to do with your time than sit on someone else's social media page and be negative, that says more about you as a human being than them. A wise woman once said to me that our opinions of others are in most cases a reflection of what we feel about ourselves (thanks Case), so think twice the next time you call someone a fat cow, it might be a sign that you feel YOU need to get your shit together.

Now, those of us who are lucky enough to have supportive friends, parents, family, siblings or all of the above are familiar with positive reinforcement. Once or twice in your life you have been told to focus on the good in you, am I right? Using myself as an example, if I want to post something on my Instagram or facebook, am I going to post a selfie where I look like shit, or a selfie where I feel pretty? Hmmm? If I'm feeling sassy, and that my leaner diet and extra work in the gym is paying off, am I going to post a photo with shitty lighting that doesn't adequately show off what I'm celebrating or am I going to post a photo that makes me feel good? What would YOU do? Think about it. I'm sick of seeing all of this 'deception' rubbish, profile pic vs in the club crap. I don't post things for other people to like me, and more often than not, other people don't either. They post photos for themselves. They post a nice photo because it makes them feel good, so where in the hell do people get the idea that they have a right to tear them down?

Returning from Europe, too much beer, processed foods, recycled air from planes and hotels, I've been left with really awful skin and a less than flatteringly fat ass. Does the world expect me to dwell on that? Think my life is over because my skin has more pimples than normal and I have cellulite on my ass? Well, not sorry, but no, I'm not going to. I'm going to celebrate the good parts of myself. I'm going to post photos that make me feel good about myself and if you have a problem with that then that is exactly what that is- your problem. So here, have some completely unfiltered photos of what would make the cut on the gram, and what wouldn't (FYI, Lighting was kind to me on this day and the cellulite doesn't even look that bad). THIS IS JUST WHAT PEOPLE DO TO FEEL GOOD/ WHEN THEY FEEL GOOD. MIND YA DAMN BUSINESS. FUCK.

Here, we enter the cliches; 'Nobody is perfect', lame, but true. No one is. Serious- the other day I watched Kylie Jenner's snapchat story of her giving a makeup tutorial and (this is not intended to be mean whatsoever) but the size of her pores made me feel so much better about the state of my skin. I always thought her skin was ridiculously flawless then I remember thinking 'wow, she's just like me'. These people we compare ourselves to are normal people, who have their own insecurities, their own flaws, and their own feelings too. They have bad days just like us. They wake up with bad breath, and unmanageable hair, and stomach rolls, and cellulite. These nasty articles demonising an anatomical feature as everyday as cellulite, only makes the rest of us feel less human. It doesn't make us feel better.

We need to come together, and normalise these things and instead say something positive. Tash has stunning, natural curves. Not once has she said 'I'm perfect, I don't have cellulite'. She's celebrated and highlighted the parts of herself she likes the most. The parts that make her feel good, just like the rest of us do. Next time you want to try the whole 'she looks so different on instagram' garbage-

1. Of course she does, she can't carry a valencia filter with her to yoga class, her gym bag is probs already full

2. Why do you even care?

'Comparison is the thief of joy' -Theodore Roosevelt